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Old 04-09-2018, 12:20 AM   #5
Evangelical
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 3,965
Default Re: Relationships/Courting

"how to you get to know someone well enough to determine if there’s something there to be built into friendship and beyond? "

When we look at courtship in the Bible, there is really little support for the idea of long-term courtship for the purpose of "getting to know if someone is right for you".

I personally believe 1 month is long enough to know if someone is marriage material or not. The human body is designed to produce chemicals of attraction when two people of the opposite sex spend enough time together. This is why arranged marriages often work and couples that have been dating for too long (say up to 10 years) lose interest in each other and fall apart when the chemicals of attraction decline. I know Indian couples who are not Christians who have long and happy marriages despite not knowing each other before marriage.

The bible shows that God created Adam and brought Eve to him. He did not tell Adam to "try her out", or "see if you like her and if not I'll make you another". Neither did God create a few women and ask Adam to date each one for a year. The modern day concept of 1-5 year "dating" with the "try before your buy" idea is really a modern concept.
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