[Curious]

I do think I understand, enough to respect your position. I have been through a similar journey myself, in a different context. StG has had another set of life experience that is valid for other situations. I have learned to respect that too, he may not be equipped to be someone who can be a lead in offering care to you right now. He may have strengths in other areas and I don't think it makes him a bad person.

I was once a mess in the middle of a Christian healing organisation. Some people could see me through my anger and pain. Some could not, even in an organisation designed to help the wounded!! Even some on leadership took my anger personally. It's good to lean towards those who can help, and be respectful but remain distant with those who are not able to help in yours or my particular need. And in releasing the ones who don't get us, we can see more clearly the ways they are trying to be supportive within their own paradigm. It actually helped me to heal when I did that.

I did find what I needed and the volcanoes that were going off in me did settle down over time. Trapped and I have both had help in the form of counselling and deliberately prioritising effort to sort things out. To recognise the depth of impact these toxic experiences have had on a person's life can be a huge and scary step in itself. Alot of loving support is necessary. My heart is to be a support and I not alone in that on this forum.