Where Has All the Orthopraxy Gone?

[Freedom]

Originally Posted by OBW

There was a lot of thought that everyone had to have elder's permission to date/marry. Seems that while they might provide advice if asked, they had much less to do with it than we thought. (At least in Dallas.) Doesn't mean there was no involvement. And probably different leading ones were different in approach.

To the best of my knowledge, this thought still exists in the LC today. I don't know how common it is, but in the LC I am in, I have heard something to this effect. I have also hear brothers from different LC's imply the same thing, that couples need to get some kind of permission to date/marry.

The problem is that there is really no official rule. If there was it would be easy to call out LC leadership and ask them why they think they have a say in people's personal lives. I know for a fact that some in the LC will say bad things behind the backs of couples who have broken this rule.

Originally Posted by OBW

May have been the fault of the environment though. An environment in which almost everyone assumed that the edict of leadership was to marry or get far apart. That assumed that every marriage was vetted and passed on by the leaders or it didn't happen. So the natural thing to do was to go ask for permission to sneeze, and to ask which side of the nose to blow first. And to ask for permission to even talk to sister so-and-so and possibly take her to the Dairy Queen for a shake. And in some cases, I heard that if a brother asked a sister about going on any kind of sort-of date, she would ask if he had gotten an OK from the "brothers."

This sounds about right. I don't think that everyone is aware of rules like these, however, most have some idea of what they are. I'm sure the assumption is made say if a couple is dating, then it has been "approved", regardless of if it actually has or not. No one wants to be the one to actually ask about these rules, or worse question the elders regarding the rules. It really leaves those in the LC in a bad situation.